Boy Tragically Killed By Hubris


12 year old Johnny Boy was innocently playing in his front driveway when he was tragically killed by hubris.

Johnny had brazenly declared to his four famous friends that he would be able to climb the neighbour’s wall and therefore win. It appears that in doing so he overestimated the capabilities of his character, propelling him towards his tragic fate.

The boy’s parents delivered a statement to the press earlier today. “Whether epic or lyric in nature,” they said, “this tragedy will hopefully lead to a cathartic purge of fear and anxiety in the audience, helping them to come to terms with the capricious and powerful nature of fate. We hope that the dramatically satisfying consequences of our son’s universal flaws will serve as a lesson to you all, at least during this current news cycle.”

As Boy climbed the wall his friends reportedly formed a chorus to warn him off his chosen path, but for some reason Boy could not hear them or he chose to persist in his task heroically despite them. They later explained to reporters in unison:

“O Great Zeus above!

That sweet tongue of courage

Mocks and taunts us,

For no man should climb as high

As great Olympus!

Let your child awake once more!”

The sheer humanity of their grief made for some great footage. Luckily, journalists were on hand to film them and describe the events in emotionally resonant tones. “Johnny Boy was struggling to do the right thing but his choices inadvertently led to his own downfall,” they said. “It is a tragedy. The community is struggling to cope with this tragedy .”

Sadly it appears that if Boy had only possessed more knowledge about the structural condition of the wall, knowledge that was readily available but by some circuitous misfortune was not presented to Boy at the relevant time, the whole tragedy could have been easily averted. We have no choice but to ponder the impermeable nature of the human condition before the ever-present threat of profound suffering.

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5 Responses

  1. megamezzo says:

    “Euripides cannot hold a candle to the great Throwcase!” They chorused.

  2. apse says:

    your writing style reminds me of douglas adams in a way. i like it!

  3. coqdorysme says:

    “and therefore win” TOO GOOD

  4. Anonymous says:

    I will never understand you little brother 🙂

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