Man Does Not Work In An Office
John Man, social media activist and part time thinker, does not work in an office. He could have worked in an office had he failed at life, but thankfully he does not work in an office because he has succeeded at life.
“Just yesterday I had a job that required me to be outside,” he said. “I immediately tweeted a photo of myself and mentioned how I was not in an office.”
Man made this reference in an astonishing way. “At first,” he said, “I was going to write something like ‘what a beautiful place’ or ‘I enjoy this job I have that allows me to work outdoors’ or ‘it’s sunny and I’m smiling so I’m literally the best guy ever,’ but I decided against it. I wanted to be or appear more intelligent, so instead of those simple inane things, I wrote “another day at the office!”
Man says the response was immediate, with at least some of his friends liking the photo and others probably looking at it. He attributes this outrageous success to his extraordinary use of language in the phrase “another day at the office!”
“Let me explain,” said Man. “I was not really in an office; a quick look at the surrounding greenery and awe-inspiringly famous land-marks is enough to make that clear. What, then, to make of my apparently ‘incorrect’ claim that I am having another day at the office?” At this moment, Man held his hands together and tapped his goatee. “Well, it is all a devious linguistic ruse, you see; subtle, yet effective. I am pointing out that I am not in an office by way of highlighting the non-office appearance of my work location as if it were an office, which it is not. Classic misdirection, really.”
Man is confident that by picking up on his quirky use of language all his friends will appreciate the uniqueness of his life. “I always compare what my photos look like to what I imagine other people’s lives to be like. That’s the sort of originality you can’t get in an office.”